Betrayal

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I bought my first e-book. So why do I feel so guilty?

Because I succumbed to the pleasure of immediacy instead of getting off my duff, getting dressed, getting in my car—putting gas in my car—driving to the local B&N, finding a place to park, searching through the shelves for what I wanted, standing in line, paying for my purchase, and driving back home.

The thing is, I love paper. I believe a tree’s greatest accomplishment in life is to become a book, next to sheltering the woodland creatures and producing oxygen of course. There’s nothing like being the first to crack the spine of a good book. And rows and rows of them at the library or in a bookstore? Be still my heart. Besides, think of all the good folks who keep their jobs when you buy a book from the bookstore. Economic stimulus!

But man I’ve got an I-Pad now and it is too cool for words and you can get virtually (pun intended) any book you want downloaded from Amazon in 30, count them 30 seconds and I don’t even have to pay for shipping and handling thank you very much.

Yep, my feelings of remorse were short-lived.

So what e-book did I get? The Road by Cormac McCarthy, which is somewhat ironic don’t you think? In his postapocalyptic (try saying that word 5x fast without spitting) future there’s no electricity or battery power left to run the equipment to read the books. You want to read? You have to find the remnants of a paper past. Gives you pause doesn’t it?

The big question is, will I do it again? Yes. I’m sorry. I will. But if it’s any consolation, I regard my E-books as a test drive only.

If I don’t love it, I have 30 seconds of buyer’s remorse before I obliterate those electrons with a keystroke. This is true liberation since I cannot bring myself to destroy real books, can’t even throw them into the recycle bin. Even if I hated reading them, I’ll give them away instead.

If I love it, I’m sure to buy the real thing and add it to my collection. You know that collection, the one that sits on shelves, makes stacks on the desk and collects dust-bunnies under the bed.

Photo credit Iqoncept

What’s a Sun Chips lover to do?

TIPS

Slice open the bag with scissors and pour the chips in a bowl. Don’t eat out of the bag unless everyone in the vicinity is wearing earplugs. One question though. Are these bags on the no fly list?

Other loud sounds: a lawn mower=90 decibels, a motorcycle=95 decibels, hair dryer=95, chain saw=110.